Saturday, December 10, 2011

Thank you, Mark Levin

Thank you, Mark Levin

Thank you so much, Mr. Levin. I think I’ve got my mind right now. While in the past there seemed to be a failya to communicate, I believe you have finally convince me on how wrong I have been about that nutcase, Ron Paul. Foolishly, I thought he believed in individual freedom, personal responsibility, and limited government. I somehow believed that an aggressive foreign policy was incompatible with a free society. I foolishly have been enslaved by the Constitution, believing it meant what it said, and said what it meant. How could have I been so wrong about the founding fathers admonitions against entangling alliances, or Republican Senator Robert Taft’s claim that “War by its very nature tended to concentrate power in the hands of the central state, and thus threatened the cherished American ideals of limited government and separation of powers."

When did that moment of revelation happen in mind, that you were right?. I am not sure if it was the tenth or fifteenth time you called Ron Paul a nut..Surely the aggregate quantity of times you called him a nut impressed me more and more, that you must surely be right. Saying it five times certainly wasn’t enough, but it certainly made more sense every time it was expressed.

Of course, it helped me a great deal that every time you called Ron Paul a nut, your decibel levels increased dramatically. Nothing is more convincing than that fifteenth time or so, when you called Ron Paul a nut, and the force of your voice pierced right into my brain. Maybe it was at that point that I got it. Verbal projection is a very important quality in life, especially in the arts. May I suggest that as a side job, you get into opera singing. Those sitting in double balcony, double Z seating will surely hear you clearly. Soprano?

And thank you for clarifying that you are not a neocon. You opposed those uprisings in Egypt and Lybia., after all. I am sure that your opposition had nothing to do with Obama’s support in those conflicts. Because your logic is impeccable, especially when it is repeated over and over at a high pitched decibel level that I haven’t experienced since my rock concert college days. Ah, those were the days, . . . Hey Mr. Levin, how about a few bars of “White Rabbit!”

And oh, that logic! You certainly convinced me that America needs to support Israel. Because why? Because “Israel’s our ally, for God’s sake!” Why waste our time thinking about the reasons Israel has such a special place in American hearts. It just is. I get it!

Israel’s our ally, because, because,
Because, because, because, because, because,
Because of the wonderful things she does,
ya ta ta ta ta ta ta,
We’re off to fight for Israel,
She’s right, whatever she does!

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